My ink levels are low and other revelations...

I love computer prompts, those little windows that pop up while you're in the midst of a deep and complicated e-mail response to a friend or trying to navigate through cyberspace and it appears that you have overdosed on Dramamine. My all-time favorite (and I think many of you will agree) is Mr. Office Assistant Clip--that paper clipper who "bonks" on your screen from the inside and insists on helping you write your letter, your report, your whatever.

The first time I encountered Mr. Clip, I found him amusing and entertaining (that's what happens when you live alone)...until I needed to do what I needed to do. He's like a possessed puppy, sniffing and barking in your face, but you have no dog treats that will appease him. It didn't take long for me to tire of his "company", but it did take a while to find a way to rescind his invitation to the dance. Every once in a while I miss him (usually after I've taken major medication or have bumped my head on something), and I wonder how he's doing. Has he taken a vacation lately, other than the one I forced on him, at least in my little world? Does he have a family? Now wouldn't that be weird to have lots of little paper cliplets bouncing around on the computer screen? Does Mrs. Clip work outside the home--I'm assuming yes, if only to get away from her significantly irritating "other"?

In my next life, I want to be computer programming literate enough to create some additional, irritating "helpers" and "pop-up" reminders and to be able to selectively send them to people who are arrogant (especially about their computer skills) or have been mean to someone, including me. Wouldn't that be poetic justice? Or is that computic justice? Meanwhile, I'll have to be content knowing that what's popping up on my screen asking me if I need the latest updates for Adobe Reader, Norton Security, or replacement ink cartridges, etc., while I am in the middle of writing my epic novel on "How to Get Along" (so I can win the Nobel Prize for world peace), is also popping up on almost everyone else's, including the arrogant and mean people who, like Mr. Clip, have been "clicked" into oblivion.