Can we exchange Monday for another day...

Could Monday be the new Friday, at least this week and then when Friday comes around, I'll switch them back and that way I'll get a weekend in the middle of my week and a weekend at the end and that means I'll only pretend to work for three days instead of five. I'm running out of convincing ways of appearing to do my tasks. I have learned that I can almost go into a trance while seated at my desk staring at my computer, but the give-away is that just as I am passing into the netherworld of unconsciousness, my head droops, I drool a little and the sizzle from my keyboard jerks me right back into the real world. There are only so many excuses I can give for why I need a new keyboard. I have no children or errant pets at work, so I can't blame them and no one else uses my computer or my office, so it looks like the finger of blame is pointing straight at moi! That's why I need four days off every week--fewer opportunities for shorting out keyboards and more time to do what I really want to do with my time. Number one on that list is DO NOT WORK TOO OFTEN OR TOO LONG OR TOO HARD! Number two is DO NOT GET COMFORTABLE AT WORK AND START TO LIKE WHAT YOU ARE DOING--IT COULD BE HABIT-FORMING AND PEOPLE WILL GET THE WRONG IDEA ABOUT YOU; THAT YOU ARE A CONTRIBUTING MEMBER OF SOCIETY WHEN WHAT YOU REALLY WANT TO BE IS A LAZY, GOOD-FOR-NOTHING (SOMETHING MY MOTHER WARNED ME ABOUT MY WHOLE LIFE). Thanks Mom.